A Clean Desktop Makes For a Happy Heart. And Fewer Awkward Moments.

So, I took my Mac in to the Apple Store today to have one of those cutie-pie Apple dudes figure out why she's so excruciatingly slow. I love my Little Miss Macintosh. She's awesome. But she does have some, oh, let's call them quirks. Well, one, really -- only one, pretty much. Bob always says she's slow, and danged if I've ever been able to prove him wrong! Yeah, she's a little slow, but she's worth waiting for, I say. At least until recently. One click o' the mouse and you're stuck waiting for, like, 30 seconds!

Oh, ha ha. Make fun of Kimi for not having 30 seconds of patience. But think about it -- every click? No, it was getting bad. Especially when I'd accidentally click on the wrong thing! I'm not that coordinated and I often miss the little icon I'm aiming for. Those mice are hard to drive! (Doh! Funny pun! Hard? Drive? Hard drive? Computer? Get it?! Hoo-wee, I crack myself up!) It's the worst when I click on the wrong thing. I start pleading with my little computer friend, "No! Wait! I didn't mean it! Just kidding! Jay Kay! Aaaawwww! Come on! Don't show me the twirly timer thingy! Aaarrrrrgh!" That little twirly timer thingy is getting on my last nerve.

Anyway, remember when I said, "cutie-pie Apple dudes?" Well, normally the Apple dudes are cutie-pies. Some of them are even GIRL cutie-pie Apple dudes. But occasionally I get a not-as-cutie-pie Apple dude. (Um, yes, I do go in there often enough to know all of this. I took Mac classes, okay? You should all be so lucky, seriously! Right Erin? Diane? Taffy? That's right!)

Today, not only did I get a not-as-cutie-pie Apple dude, I got a dude with no sense of humor! And we spent like an hour and a half together! Well, you know how I like to try to make Embarrassing Moments funny instead of embarrassing? Well, you can't say I didn't try...

For some reason I forgot that he would be booting my computer up in public and in full view of anyone and everyone in the store. I should remember that because they always do and I always feel a little violated and exposed. Today I immediately noticed what a mess my desktop was! Pictures, files, and programs scattered willy nilly over my Lake Powell screen saver. Shoot! I should have cleaned that up and lined them up in neat little columns. And even though I'd already figured out my Apple dude was lacking a funny bone, I still went ahead and said, "I feel like I just let the cable guy into my messy room, you know, with my desktop looking like that." Pause. Then I had to do a little "that was a joke" laugh. No response. Nice. Way to make an awkward moment out of a bonding opportunity, Apple dude.

Next time I'm going to check the box marked Request Cutie-pie Apple Dude when I make my appointment. I must have missed that one and checked Request Humorless Apple Dude instead. I've really gotta learn how to handle that mouse better.